PHRONTISTERIES

For this block I thought everything was enjoyable, I thought its very much about expressing ourselves in our artpiece, not having to do what lecturers like but what I like.

Correct me if I am wrong but I do think one's process in design and development is fairly different from the others. Not everyone scribble and doodle in their sketchbook to get ideas. For the least I don't. I don't really depend on the sketchbook for my development and ideas, and I have to force myself to show my lecturer my development and thinking? I find it a chore for me. To record and pen my imagination onto paper cos I can draw as well as my imagination. And for me, If I can't draw it well, I won't. 

So why is my lecturer forcing me? Well not exactly forcing me but pressurising me.

I feel angry when I chose to go this far and end screwing up my studies cos the travelling is hindering me. No I am not putting the blame on to travelling I chose this whole thing on my own. I thought I would overcome this travelling hinderance but I can't. I blame my results on it, I blame my discipline on it. I blame my laziness on it. JUST COS MY SCHOOL IS IN FUCKING TAMPINES WHEN I STAY IN BOON LAY. 

To say the truth, maybe it's because I don't feel any belonging in TP. I really don't. I truly believe that I won't miss a thing in TP when I finally fucking graduate. I'm just here for a design diploma. But I don't feel as motivated and driven as before.

I just hope the lecturers will be more gracious to me, not that I deserve it, but just be a little gracious to me and it'll go a long way.